Life, Even In Pain
by Delenn
Summary: EDITED and now almost readable: 05-29-04What were the reactions by all when Darla shows up pregnant?


**Disclaimer: All characters from the series' 'Angel' and 'Buffy: The Vampire Slayer' don't belong to me, they belong to whoever created/wrote/owns them. I'd also like to note that the bodies of the characters and their looks belong to who plays them…. And don't you feel sorry for David, being drooled over by hundreds (in not millions) of girls? Poor guy!   
  
Author's Notes: Hello all! This is my SECOND EVER 'Angel' fanfiction. I have extensive writing in the Ares/Xena realm of the show 'Xena: Warrior Princess' though, and their screwed up relationship kinda makes this screwed up relationship easier to write! ;) Also, I started watching 'Buffy: Vampire Slayer' because Angel was so damn good looking, and when he got his own show… Well let's just say it was 'Goodbye Buffy!' So unfortunately I have trouble finding 'Angel' on my stations now, so while I caught most of the first few episodes I have seen hardly any of Season 2 and only one episode of Season 3, and I am relying mostly on online summaries for what little information I have. (Ok it was detailed, but sooooo?) The last episode I caught was 'That Vision Thing' and Darla's pregnant! Holy crap did that do a number on me, so after extensive online research I was able to determine 'when' if not 'how' or 'why'. So, yeah, this is my take on what will happen when Darla 'Pays Daddy a visit.' This whole thing takes place after Darla's line (and the end of the ep) "You are my last hope. I've been told you are very powerful, very wise. I've tried everything and I can't get rid of it, so I ask you. What is this thing growing inside of me? And how is it possible?"   
And this is one of my takes on how things happened, and the reactions they caused.   
More Author's Notes: So when this was originally written, I misinterpreted everything so badly that it wasn't even funny. And I hated it. Because, obviously, it made no sense. Thus, I've finally edited it. And, if it seems slightly over-exaggerated, I did the best I could without destroying the whole previous story.****   
  
Spoilers: Afore-spoiled episode 'That Vision Thing', and probably everything before that.   
  
Summary: What were the reactions by all when Darla shows up pregnant?   
  
Warnings: None.   
  
Pairing: Darla/Angel   
  
Classification: Angst/Romance   
  
Rating: PG-13 for mentions of sex, but not really   
  
Date started: October 20th, 2001. Date Finished: October 21st, 2001, 1:53am. Revised: May 29th, 2004, 3:23pm**

* * *

Life, Even In Pain…   
By Delenn

  
  
Trembling Darla turned the knob of the door, trying desperately to control herself before entering the room. She could _feel_ him, and for the first time with her darling boy, she was almost scared of him.   
  
She hadn't wanted to come, she had done everything in her power to avoid coming, even going to the extreme of trying to devoid herself of this problem… Well, she had thought of that first, but to be honest there was something about the idea that she found appealing. She was so close to opening the door when his voice echoed in her head, the voice of her darling boy _I'll kill you_. Still she couldn't quite believe he'd done what he had to _her_ and then informed her that the next time he saw her he would stake her, like she was no more to him then the average whore.   
  
She'd been a whore before and she was damned if she'd let him make her feel like that again. _I'm stronger then that_ Darla sternly reminded herself and was about to open the door, when it flew open to reveal the face of her dreams and nightmares.   
  
Angel sensed her just outside the door; he didn't understand why she wouldn't just come in already… She had to know that he knew that she was there. He could practically _smell_ her.   
  
Granted he'd said he would kill her, and he had fully meant it… but still it would be nice to have his friends there for support, after all they wanted nothing more then to see _her_ dead and out of his mind forever this time.   
  
_That's it, I'll face her out there if she won't come in_ Angel told himself and, Cordelia and Wesley in tow, threw open the door.   
  
Darla looked past Angel quickly avoiding his eyes, and saw his annoying humans, Cordelia and Wesley staring at her like she was the walking dead. _Well, that's true at least_ Darla morbidly thought. She almost spoke, but stopped herself, he had to say something first.   
  
Angel opened the door, stake hidden in his sleeve. He fully expected to be attacked, either verbally or physically. After all, Darla didn't take threats well.   
  
What he saw was enough to render even Angel speechless: Darla - a very pregnant Darla - doing her best to avoid looking at him. Angel didn't even want to look behind him and see what Cordelia and Wesley thought of this. Finding that he would have to speak first, Angel abruptly asked, "Darla, what are you doing here?"   
  
Darla gritted her teeth, willing herself not to fall into game-face, that was all too easy now, she had found. _I can play that game, my darling boy, I taught you only too well_. "I won't waste your time," Darla paused, already feeling slightly weak. "I'd love to stand here all night, but this _thing_ has other ideas…"   
  
Cordelia looked about ready to stake Darla anyway, but Wesley sprang into action, separating the two vampires and Cordelia, and leading Darla in to sit down - Angel trailing behind still shocked - and asking in a somewhat dumbfounded tone, "You-you're--"   
  
Darla laughed, the sound ringing through the quiet hotel, but she still refused to meet Angel's blistering gaze, the weak mortal was much easier to deal with. "Pregnant?" she stopped a moment as Wesley struggled to make the word _how_ come out of his mouth. "How? Well, why don't you ask _Angel_?"   
  
That was all the encouragement that Cordelia needed, she rounded on Darla in one swift movement, thoughts of staking the beautiful blonde running rampant in her head. "You seduced Angel finally, you must be such a proud whore!"   
  
Darla shrugged, the brunette's comments easily being ignored. She felt a strong hand guiding her chin to look up, and immediately knew that it was time to face her own demon as he spoke her name for the millionth time. "Darla…"   
  
Darla stared up at Angel, and couldn't stop the suppressed tears from forming at the edge of her eyes, which went unnoticed, her voice holding a hard edge to it. "What, no stake, precious?"   
  
Angel glared harshly at Darla, still unwilling to comprehend that his _sire_ was carrying his child. "What are you doing here?"   
  
"Simply come to inform you that you're about to be a father, Angel," Darla's voice took on a callous edge, "or should I say, _Angelus_?"   
  
Cordelia spoke, and Darla tore her eyes away from her childe's. "What does she mean, Angel?"   
  
Angel looked down, neither defending himself nor admitting his fault, but this was enough for Darla. Words hissed out of her mouth that she'd tried to suppress. "Doesn't your soul remember?"   
  
Darla's voice pulled Angel out of his thoughts, but he still didn't let himself look at her, the image of her at the door, eight months pregnant, still fresh in his mind. "You didn't stop me…"   
  
Darla glared a hole where his heart used to be, images flooding back to her, all blurred by tears… "Would you have?"   
  
Wesley sat back, shock and the thought that they would explain all _this_ keeping him quiet. Cordelia had no such qualms, having quickly adjusted to the idea of Darla doing something to Angel, she wasn't so sure that she liked this idea forming in her mind. "_What_ are you talking about?"   
  
Darla sneered; it was so obvious where the brunette's affections lay, _unfortunate for the poor girl_ Darla absently thought. Her words, however, held out no hope for forgiveness, "Isn't it _obvious_? He used me for his little whore,"   
  
Angel protested, his eyes still glued to the floor, "That's not-" Finally looking up, Angel noticed all the things he had not wished to see. His _sire_, practically in tears, _because of me_, the thought stung him as he took in the petite blond woman, who looked so fragile curled up in the couch, her stomach protruding from her diminutive form. "I," he gulped; awareness sinking in. "hurt you?" it was hardly a question.   
  
Darla merely nodded, looking down, not wishing to see the gloating look on her boy's face. He'd always wished to be in control, to best her, now she had given into defeat. He'd used her and threw her out and she'd done exactly as she'd always known how, except there had been no love and instead of his losing a soul, she'd been burdened by carrying something with one.   
  
And with the awareness came the guilt. He'd always known Darla's demons, known of her past, and had never wanted to be counted among them. He'd used her, and he'd hurt her. Angel was by her side in an instant, no longer aware of anyone but her, no longer caring which side Darla was on. Angel scooped the pregnant woman up, gently cradling his sire in his strong arms. A lone tear traced its way down his cheek as Angel begged forgiveness. "I'm sorry, so sorry… Oh darlin', Darla, I'm so sorry. I didn't think… I'm so sorry, _sire_."   
  
Over and over he repeated the same thing as she sobbed in his arms. _I can't forgive him for that; he said he'd never hurt me_. Darla weakly thought, her mind flashing back to that terrible night, as she gave in and helped him undress, realizing that he intended to have her no matter what and that there would be no love, none of the passion they'd once shared.   
  
Darla had never comprehended that her _darling boy_ would hurt her, but he had; not just physically, which she had admittedly relished, but emotionally. He had treated her as a whore and she'd let him, then he'd dismissed her away, something that hadn't happened since her days as an immortal the first time.   
  
Cordelia had sat when Darla had spoken those fateful words, _he_, not _Angelus_, but _he, Angel_! She had never thought Angel capable of digressing to sleeping with some whoring vampire, hell; even if she was his _sire_. Not just slept with, from the sounds of it,he had been rather forceful with the petite blonde, _when he could have had me_ Cordelia bitterly thought.   
  
She watched him beg the monster's forgiveness, as though she was viewing it from another place, where it didn't matter - didn't _hurt_ - as much.   
  
Wesley was - perhaps the only one - aware of his surroundings. He could hear, even with his human ears, every ragged sob from Darla. Every half muttered, half pleading apology from Angel. And Cordelia, he knew how this must have shattered her world. Himself, well he wasn't really sure what to think, _Angel slept with Darla, Darla pregnant_; this was all too much for him to take in.   
  
Wesley was vaguely aware that Darla and Angel - _us, Angelus_ he reminded himself sternly - had had a fairly detailed history together. But he had never thought about _Angel_ and Darla's history. To him she was merely the person Angel had staked to save Buffy, the one responsible for Angel's endless pain and torment. As he watched, it was apparent, that there was much more to their relationship. At least some of that history had carried over.   
  
Darla finally looked up; her sobs having quieted, and put her hand to Angel's face. Angel stared down at her, stopping in mid apology, he _knew_ that he would never be able to make up for making her feel like that. Darla looked down at the hand clasped around her stomach, and at the vampire it belonged to, and she forgave him. It was that moment looking into his eyes that she needed to be assured of his regret. "Shh precious, my darling boy, I heard you the first time…"   
  
Angel could barely stomach meeting his sire's eyes. He had promised to protect her, centuries ago, and he had failed three times. _And for what_, Angel asked himself, in a well-deserved moment of self-loathing. "I'm so sorry darlin', I failed you so many times…"   
  
Darla bit back her tongue, knowing how much it was going to take for her to fully trust him again. "And yet something wonderful has happened," she looked down at her bulging stomach, his hand still clasped over it, "we've created a life, even in our pain, Angel, _my Angel_…"   
  


The End


End file.
